Ahh color. Glorious color. A return to my simple, portable, 4" x 6" doodles. I love doing these.
I am still finding it hard to concentrate on simplifying and I'm constantly seeing something in a magazine that I want to try. Eventually I know I will drag out all my supplies and set up permanent shop again in my kitchen/studio. But it will be new and fresh and hopefully it will be less overwhelming. I have worked on cleaning house lately and restoring a sense of order and control to my life. Waiting out all the changes in my life and walking carefully through this time of transition. Doing a lot of writing in my journal. Doing some doodling. A lot of meandering, reading, contemplating, reassessing, and reordering. I feel like it's an incubation period. I have to go through this time in order to have a rebirth, a renewal. It's not easy. It's not fun. It's work and it's exhausting. But it will be worth it. I pray for God's grace to come through it knowing I relied on the power of the Holy Spirit to bear the fruit of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self-control in me. That's all I really want out of this. To know that even in the worst of times, my actions didn't grieve the Holy Spirit in me. I want to be free - not free to do whatever I want - that's not true freedom. I want to be free of my shame, my shackles, an oppressive and depressed spirit that has held me in it's grip for far too long. I want to be free to live and to laugh and to enjoy. To fly. Wherever God takes me on wings of Faith, Hope, Love. No more spiritual bondage, no more feeling "less than" or unworthy. I want to be able to walk through this knowing God is with me and with my head held high, not because I'm proud, but because I'm His, and He is protecting me.
